The Neurospicy Rollercoaster: 9 Creator Challenges I Thought Were Just Me Being a Hot Mess

 

For years, I thought I was just wildly inconsistent, emotionally fragile, overly ambitious, and possibly allergic to deadlines. As it turns out, I’ve just been riding the neurodivergent rollercoaster without realizing the lap bar was never locked. 

Now that I know my brain is more AuDHD than lazy or broken, I can finally make sense of why the creative process has often felt like trying to build IKEA furniture during a windstorm with missing instructions and several duplicate Allen keys. 

So, in the spirit of self-awareness (and hopefully helping someone else feel a little less alone), here are the recurring challenges I face as a creator and writer who now has 87% more clarity and 22% less shame. 

1. All or Nothing, Baby 

I’m either writing 4,000 words before lunch or spending an hour organizing my desk before deciding it’s too emotionally dangerous to open a Google Doc. There is no middle ground. Moderation is a suspicious concept probably invented by neurotypicals who didn’t want us to have fun. 

2. Hyperfocus, Until I Forget to Eat or Pee 

When I’m in the zone, I am the zone. I’ll write a whole chapter, storyboard a video, and plan a ten-book series… and then look up to realize it’s 3 a.m., my legs are asleep, and I haven’t blinked in an hour. 

3. Executive Dysfunction: Like Procrastination, But Make It Existential 

I want to write. I need to write. I should write. ...I reorganized my Gmail folders, watched a documentary about rogue squirrels, and now I’m crying on the kitchen floor because the idea of starting feels like launching a spaceship. 

4. The Great “How Should This Be Done?” Spiral 

Should this be a Substack post? A novel? A tweet thread? A serialized fiction saga with companion podcasts and interpretive dance? I often spend more time agonizing over the format than actually, you know, doing the thing. 

5. Not Trusting My Take (Even Though It’s What People Like Most) 

I’ll write something quirky, heartfelt, and 100% me—and then panic-delete it because I assume it’s “too much” or “not professional.” Spoiler: the posts where I sound like myself are the ones that resonate. Spoiler 2: I will still forget that next time. 

6. Overambition, a Love Language 

I cannot just write a blog post. It must also be a series, a video essay, a newsletter launch, a book proposal, and possibly the start of a new career as a multimedia empire. Until, of course, I burn out and cry into a half-written outline for an audio drama. 

7. Fear of Failure Dressed as Perfectionism 

If I don’t finish something, it can’t be bad. If I never put it out there, it won’t be rejected. But also, if it’s not exactly how I pictured it in my head, then it’s clearly garbage and I must start over from scratch. Again. 

8. Always Looking for the Perfect Fresh Start 

Ah yes, the eternal belief that if I just reset everything—new planner, new schedule, new name, new socks—I’ll finally “get it right.” Narrator: He did not, in fact, get it right. But he did have very organized socks for a week. 

9. Comparison Brain is a Jerk 

Even when something I create gets praise, part of me is like, “They’re just being nice. Real writers don’t forget entire subplots halfway through a paragraph.” It’s exhausting. But I’m learning to tell that voice to kindly go take a nap. 

I used to think these struggles were personal failings. Now I understand they’re just how my brain processes the world—and that doesn’t make me broken. It makes me uniquely wired, often overwhelmed, and occasionally brilliant in short, hyper-focused bursts. 

I’m learning to work with my brain instead of against it. Slowly. Imperfectly. With a lot of breaks and probably too many browser tabs open. And if any of this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. There’s room on the neurospicy rollercoaster. Just… hold on tight. The lap bar might be a metaphor.