My Ambitious Goals For 2011

When someone asks what I do for a living, I can reply, 'Well, I am a freelance writer. Oh, and of course the inventor of the Pop Tart Cannon."

Build a second home. From cheese.

Sell at least 5 short stories.

Watch at least 200 movies. What, you say that is the opposite of being ambitious? Do you realize how busy I am? It'll take a lot of work to find that much sitting and eating popcorn time.

Make sure that 'Sharp Dressed Man' is played whenever I enter a room.

Convince Emily that bacon is a vegetable and should be included in meals on an almost daily basis.

Solve the Caramilk Secret.

Write an entire novel (because apparently, that is an important step towards getting it published).

Find out once and for all if buried treasure really does lie under the ground of my backyard.

Find another house project for Emiily to do, so that I can accomplish my previously mention goal.

Take a picture of Summit carting Crosby and post it on this blog.


Buy a new computer because I am beginning to think that hamsters are now actually running inside my current one.

Land at least 3 consistent clients for my writing career.

Be the kind of husband that deserves a beautiful, funny, intelligent, awesome wife like Emily.

Get several articles published in a print magazine.

Continue to go on long walks with Summit, because the exercise is good for both of us.

Hunt down Carrot Top and ask him, "Why?"

Triple the number of regular readers on this blog. And you can all help by recommending this blog to others who like to spend time looking at words. Let them all know that if they read this blog, then they will get a free awesplosion in their belly!

Read more.

Spend more quality time with those who are awesome

Challenge myself by trying to do writing projects that I've never done before (screenplays, manuals, greeting cards, etc)

Take a radish from Georg Lucas' garden. That'll show him.

Write more poetry.

Sit on my porch and tell random kids to get off my lawn. If no kids are on my lawn, find some kids and put them on my lawn. Then proceed to tell those whippersnappers to get off.


Write and write and when I'm done that, write some more.

Wish you all the best 2011 ever (though let's enjoy the last bit of this year first, okay?).


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