A Plea for Help Gathering the Puzzle Pieces of Life and Career

I currently have two recurring clients. There are several opportunities for work with various publications. I must believe as I work through my sometimes crippling mental health. The promise of regular work should afford me the energy to rebuild Beyond the Balcony and The Movie Breakdown and craft sellable manuscripts for a novel and pop culture book. Creation is my air, blood, and soul, but I've been starving it while suffering staggering blows to my self-confidence and self-worth ever since the pandemic smashed into our lives way back in March 2020.

The client work looks to be consistent for the near future, and that should calm the tornado of anxiety and panic I've been swirling through. Some actual regular income will allow my mind to focus on reviewing movies, recording podcasts, and crafting fiction again on top of my day job. It is a magical elixir to finally feel like my writing skills are needed and adding value to the world again.

I recognize how decimated my confidence became when the negative voices shouted my client must be a scam when they praised my creativity and writing skills and were willing to pay the rate that I requested. But they are real, and obviously, my skills are appreciated. It will be a long time before I feel fully confident in myself again, but I'll recover what was lost by providing my best work and celebrating those small wins.

Even though my future is finally looking hopeful, I still have many debilitating stresses haunting me. My challenges and struggles of the past few years have put me in a spot where I have a $5,000.00 debt that I need to pay off immediately. Most of my client pay should arrive next month, but I'm not confident with my current work that I'll get that amount paid off before it starts becoming a catastrophic issue for my family and life.

I'm grateful for my current work, and I have been humbled by my reader's constant love and support despite not knowing many of them in real life. I realize this site has not provided the entertainment promised for a long time.

The game plan is to start crafting regular reviews and articles throughout the summer, if it builds an audience and I'm able to manage it as an almost daily enterprise, then I'll look into either creating a Patreon or Substack in the fall.

I need to prove I can craft regular articles and podcasts again expecting paid subscribers. I am in a spot where I need some money now, and I am calling out to any generous and compassionate angels who can help me out of this financial rut. Once again, I am providing my PayPal link in case anyone feels moved and is in a spot where they can provide some payment to help with the current debt I need to immediately pay off.

My career is getting back on track. I am rediscovering optimism to truly believe I can pay off a significant amount of that amount with my own work. It would really calm my nerves and soothe my anxiety if any surprise donations could arrive in the next week and a half.

I'm embarrassed with this plea, and I'm sure I'll survive if it gets ignored.

Either way, I do plan to whip this site back in shape and provide the entertainment that my marvellous readers and listeners deserve.

For now, I have some client work to create on my road to career recovery.