“Do I really have AuDHD?” — When Imposter Syndrome Haunts Your Diagnosis

The video was a mirror held up to my brain. It articulated experiences I’d always known intuitively, but never had language for. Every “quirk,” every exhaustion, every shutdown spoke to those hidden gears inside me.

Maybe you’ve felt it, too: hearing a description of autism (or ADHD, or both) and thinking, “That’s me. That’s me, too.”

In my case, with AuDHD being a lens that overlays both autism and ADHD, there’s often confusion. Am I just hyperactive, disorganized, anxious, a daydreamer, overwhelmed, socially awkward... and that’s it? Or is there something deeper, something neurological quietly shaping my life?

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Imposter Syndrome and the Diagnosis Question

One of the most common shadows that follows late diagnosis is imposter syndrome:

• “If I were really autistic, I’d always be more ‘obvious.’”

• “Maybe I’m just making excuses for all my mistakes.”

• “Am I faking, misremembering, overselling my struggles?”

Because society expects autism to look a certain way (stereotypes, tropes, “classic” autism), many of us fall through the cracks. Especially those of us with a subtler presentation, or whose ADHD traits muddle the picture.

When you finally receive a diagnosis, it can feel like permission, but also a question mark. You think: If I don’t look like that autistic person, am I even valid?

That’s where the video helped me. It laid out experiences I’d internalized as “me being weird,” “me being lazy,” “me being broken.” Seeing them in a lineup of autistic traits made something click: these weren’t just quirks. These were patterns. Neurological signatures.

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What I “Checked” in the Video

Below are themes or traits from the video that felt deeply familiar to me. (If you’re late-diagnosed or self-diagnosing, you might see yourself here too.)

1. Executive Function Overload — difficulty planning, starting tasks, switching between tasks, keeping track of time.

2. Sensory Sensitivities — being overwhelmed by noises, textures, lights.

3. Masking and Camouflaging — how much energy is spent trying to “pass” as neurotypical socially.

4. Hyperfocus / Inertia — alternating between getting lost in something and being stuck.

5. Emotional Dysregulation — feeling things intensely, unexpected meltdowns or shutdowns.

6. Social Fatigue — needing long recovery after socializing, difficulty in small talk or ambiguity.

7. Identity Tension — not fully relating to “neurotypical me” or “autistic stereotype me.”

For me, watching that video was like taking pieces of a puzzle and seeing them line up. The soft corners, the odd angles, the shapes I’d forced to fit earlier but never quite did.

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A Word to My Fellow Strugglers

To you who’s reading this, wondering if your diagnosis was “real enough”: I see you. Whatever the timing, whatever the journey, your experience is valid. You don’t need to look a certain way. You just are.

Here are some things that helped me, and may help you:

• Journal and collect evidence
  Keep a private notebook (digital or physical) of moments you struggled, or where you felt “off.” Over time you’ll see patterns.

• Seek community
  Late-diagnosed, autistic, ADHD, AuDHD communities are full of people who get the confusing overlap. Sharing helps.

• Therapy / coaching
  Finding someone who understands neurodivergence can help you reframe your internal critic.

• Self-compassion
  So often we beat ourselves up for not being “better.” But under the hood, you’ve been doing the best you can with the tools you had.