Things I Probably Should Have Figured Out Pointed to Me Being AuDHD

If I had a week to finish a task, my brain would assure me every day that I had a whole week left—until suddenly, it was the day it was due.

I’d often skip brushing my teeth because I “just did that.” A dry toothbrush would later reveal that “just” meant yesterday (if I was lucky).

Strong-smelling foods or perfumes meant an instant headache and an immediate need to escape.

I’d impulsively decide to start something new because it felt thrilling, but if someone unexpectedly stopped by or plans changed, I’d panic and hide.

I never just played games. I invented elaborate stats, wrote supplemental stories, and thought about them before falling asleep. Then I’d obsessively research their history online and start crafting my own versions, until I’d finally shame myself for being “too obsessive” and abandon it all.

Group conversations felt like trying to solve a Rubik’s Cube blindfolded.

When someone said they “liked” something, I’d assume it was how I liked things: “So you know every bit of trivia about Star Wars and can quote every scene verbatim?”

Despite the embarrassment, acting out fictional conversations or pretending to be a wrestling announcer listing the next match card gave me real comfort and joy.

The ring of the phone, a knock on the door, or even someone calling my name unexpectedly could make my body tense up like I was mid-transformation into the Hulk (the less-green version).

Acting felt natural because I’d been performing my whole life, only now, I finally had a script.

I related deeply to Gizmo’s hatred of bright lights, especially sunlight.

I’d often change patterns or question routines because someone I admired did things differently. I’d spend ages watching how others behaved, spoke, or reacted; trying to decode the rules of being human.

And then there’s the constant presence of BRAIN FOG!: The Movie. A nightly feature presentation starring confusion, exhaustion, and the eternal question: What was I supposed to be doing again?

Every morning began with the promise that this would be the day I’d stay focused and productive. Most nights ended with me feeling like a failure.