What Matters

 

We’re fast approaching a new year, and I’ve been feeling pretty down on myself. 2026 feels like it could be a fresh start by being the year I get back to reviewing movies, actually implement new plans to grow the site, and refocus on building my career.

But that’s also the hope I carry at the start of every year. I’ve lost count of how many relaunches or fresh starts this site has gone through. How many times I’ve looked ahead and vowed that this year will be different. This year will be better.

And somehow, 2025 has blown past me anyway. I’m panicking about making enough money for Christmas, stressing about finding regular work, and doing my best to push away that old, familiar thought that I’m a failure.

But 2025 wasn’t all bad.

I finally got some answers this year about why I’ve struggled so much and why my brain works the way it does. That clarity is priceless. I’m learning how to work with my brain instead of feeling like I’m constantly wrestling against it. Knowing I'm neurodivergent is massive.

Most importantly, those three people up there in the photo with me? They’re still here. They love me. They believe in me. They’re ready to support me through the mess and the rebuilding.

I’m scared. I’m frustrated. But I also know I’m loved, and I love them deeply in return.

That’s what really matters.

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