Keeping the Streak No One Cares About Alive

There are a few years where I posted at least 365 times on this site.

There are several years where I posted far less.

The thing they all have in common is that readers didn’t really care.

Don’t get me wrong. I’ve received heartfelt messages and comments over things I’ve written. Some posts and articles have genuinely connected with people in deep, meaningful ways.

But whether I post every single day or not? That seems to matter to exactly one person.

Unfortunately, that person is me.

Somewhere along the way, running this site, the idea of a daily posting streak became a coping mechanism. In years filled with chaos, uncertainty, and stress, at least I could point to one constant: something went up every day. Even if that “something” was just a photo, a quick thought, or a half-formed idea.

Neurodivergence often turns autonomy into a battle. There’s a constant, quiet urge to prove your value in a world where you already feel slightly out of step or on the outside. I’ve clearly warped the streak into something far more important than it actually is. A distorted marker of success, when in reality it has very little to do with the value of this site or my work.

This is the familiar AuDHD trap of “all or nothing.” In my head, something must be posted every day, even if it comes at the expense of other areas of my life. Even if taking a few extra days to write a vivid, thoughtful essay would be far more meaningful for me and for readers.

And here’s the inevitable truth: one day, the streak will end.

Keeping it alive as some sacred symbol of discipline or success is more hindrance than a help. The real fear right now isn’t breaking the streak, but if it is realistic, it is to keep a site, a newsletter, and a podcast running weekly while also doing theatre, freelancing for clients, writing for other editors, and trying to be a present husband and a good dad.

I don’t have a clean answer yet.

What I do know is this: the priorities that will actually benefit me in the long term, and help me succeed as a husband, father, and creator have very little to do with whether something gets posted on this site every single day.

___________________________________

If my work resonates with you, then please consider supporting me either by subscribing to my Life on the Balcony newsletter, throwing a tip my way through the Support Me badge or my Ko-fi page, or considering hiring me for your business.