Reality Check

Here we are. I am writing a post for April 30th, and it is April 30th.

I'm not scrambling to throw together 5 posts in an attempt to 'catch up' and date them with long-past numbers.

My brain is soothed. But at this exact moment, I have little assurance that the cycle will not flow through again. Or that my career will gallop along a shiny path. No promises of increased subscribers, new readers, or landing well-paying work.

Nothing but the possibility that one rather sabotage-filled routine has hit the end. At this moment, at least.

I am in a spot where making around a thousand dollars in the next 20 days would be a golden lifeline. My past and my shattered confidence are convinced that for this to happen, I need a miracle. My life says sometimes those happen.

My podcast numbers are so low that ad money from episodes accumulates to the equivalent of about 6 coffees over a few months. My ads are currently disabled on the site, with the money earned at around $16.00 since October, and the only way to activate them is to spend a few hundred dollars I don't have.

I do have pledges for the Life on the Balcony newsletter, but I can't access that until I launch the paid tier, and I want to actually be producing work before I do that.

So, can I reach a thousand dollars in 20 days? Maybe. If I suddenly land a surprising amount of well-paying work out of nowhere, and everything falls in place where I can activate ads, launch a paid tier, and maybe even sell a PDF of my best work that you know. . . actually sells a humble amount.

But for now, I want May to be a very successful and entertaining month here on the site. Being caught up means there is at least a shot.

Now, the real work begins.

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