Things to Be Done

Maybe the words I fear the most.

Usually means I missed something. Or I am not prioritizing the way others feel I should. Or choosing rest at this moment is the wrong choice. Or some type of hidden expectation that is harder to unscramble than the expected work.

I sit here with a brain that feels like it just got off the grill. A body that must have just wrestled a bear. A spirit that flickers.

I often feel like I lack control. That I am still that 4-year-old, ashamed of my choices and lacking autonomy.

There always seem to be things to be done, and I'm desperate to get it right.

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