Eight Things I'm Reminding Myself This Week (and Maybe You Need to Hear Them Too)

One major thing I’ve learned as a parent, besides the fact that small children have the energy of a caffeine-fueled tornado, is how to view advice. Before I became a dad, I thought advice was basically a strict manual, a set of rules you had to obey in order to not, say, accidentally leave your newborn on the roof of the car. (Spoiler: I never did that.) 

Now I realize that advice is really just one person telling you, "Here’s what worked for me, maybe it’ll work for you, maybe it’ll just make you feel vaguely judged, but here it is anyway." 

You’re allowed to adapt it. 

You're allowed to ignore it. 

You’re allowed to cherry-pick it the way my daughter cherry-picks M&Ms out of trail mix. 

And in that spirit, here’s a fresh collection of things I’m trying to remind myself of this week. Because it’s a BIG week. We are heading into tech week for The Music Man (show opens Friday! Tickets here if you’re local). I'm trying to breathe life back into Beyond the Balcony with new reviews, articles, podcast episodes, and (as always) a bit of joyful chaos. I’m actively searching for more work because, fun fact, living indoors and feeding one's family is still a thing society expects. 

Oh, and I’m trying to show myself self-compassion through it all — something my neurodivergent brain finds about as easy as explaining taxes to a cat. 

So here it is — a list, not of rules, but reminders. Things that, if nothing else, might help you (and me) survive the next week with our hope intact. 

1. Perfection is a Myth. Progress is the Win. My neurodivergent brain is wired for "all or nothing." If it’s not perfect, why bother? But you know what? Imperfect articles, imperfect rehearsals, imperfect job searches — these are still progress. Progress is the real goal. Not perfection. (And certainly not impressing imaginary critics who live in my head and sound suspiciously like that one second-grade teacher who thought I talked too much.) 

2. Rest is Not Failure. Sometimes my brain tricks me into thinking that unless I am constantly producing, achieving, fixing, solving, saving the day, and making homemade lasagna from scratch, I’m failing at life. Truth: Rest is an essential part of doing good work. Truth: Rest is an essential part of being a good human. Truth: No one needs you to sprint full-speed into the ground. 

3. Joy Counts Too. It’s easy to tell myself "I'll have fun after the to-do list is done." But my to-do list is, at this point, longer than War and Peace and significantly less entertaining. Joy isn't a reward for finishing life. It's part of life. Take the walk. Play the game. Sing the showtunes. (Or in my case, literally sing the showtunes because I have lines to memorize.) 

4. Self-Compassion is a Superpower, Not a Luxury. Old me thought being hard on myself was how you get things done. Neurodivergent-me-under-construction knows now: Compassion is how you build a life worth living. If I miss a post, mess up a scene, forget a line, or need a nap instead of writing an op-ed... It doesn’t mean I’m lazy. It means I’m human. A human doing their best. 

5. You Can Be Both Grateful and Struggling. I’m grateful for my family, my creative projects, this wild and exhausting journey. And also, sometimes, I’m exhausted and anxious and need a good cry (or at least a very serious talking-to from the dog). Gratitude doesn't cancel out struggle. Both can exist at the same time. Both are valid. 

6. Comparison is a Trap (Again). There will always be someone who looks like they’re thriving while I’m juggling flaming torches while blindfolded. The secret: You’re not competing with them. You’re building your own weird, beautiful, messy life. And your story is yours to tell. Not theirs to judge. 

7. Sensory Overload Happens. Plan Accordingly. With tech week, job searches, and writing deadlines, my brain is basically one loud crowded train station right now. There’s no shame in planning for that. Quiet time is not optional. Noise-cancelling headphones are a gift. Deep breaths are medicine. It’s not about being tougher. It’s about giving my brain what it needs to function. 

8. This Week is a Chapter, Not the Whole Book. Yes, this week is big and busy. Yes, it matters. But it’s not everything. Whether it feels like a triumph or a trainwreck (or some combination of both), it’s just one chapter in a much bigger story. And if I know anything, it’s that messy chapters make for better books anyway. 

So here's the deal: Beyond the Balcony is roaring back to life this week (or at least wobbling energetically in its general direction). Expect reviews. Expect podcasts. Expect more heart and humour and hope. And expect a few missed steps, because this is a marathon, not a sprint — and frankly, I never was good at sprinting. 

Thanks for being here. Thanks for caring. Thanks for understanding that sometimes the best advice isn’t a rulebook — it’s a reminder that you’re already doing better than you think. And sometimes, the best we can do is keep singing, even if we forget a few lines. (But hopefully not during Friday’s opening night. Fingers crossed.)