The Truth About Procrastination

I started out 2022 with so much hope and excitement for Beyond the Balcony and The Movie Breakdown. This was the year were there would be at least one new movie review a week. On top of that, there would be a review series of every MCU and Disney animated theatrical release. This would be the year to kick-start the grand plans for a weekly serialized story as an extra bonus creative endeavour on top of all the pieces about pop culture and movies that would be posted.

On top of the site success, I'd have more articles posted at major publications, and I'd have that finished manuscript to shop around to agents to reach my published novelist dreams. Of course, I'd also have the completed non-fiction book on film history. By the end of the year, I'd be able to announce I was part of a critic's association.

Most of those things didn't happen. The site did have an article posted every day, but most of the credit needs to go to the amazing work done by this year's new contributor and my dear friend, Scott Martin. 

Some of the blame goes to client work. Some of the blame goes to the toxic cocktail of depression and anxiety that got mixed from my career still suffering from the effects of the pandemic as I've lost many clients and seen a huge drop in income. A year ago at this time, I was bummed out that my struggling career meant that I wouldn't be able to afford to buy my son a Switch for Christmas, and a year later, the situation is actually worse. I have felt burnt out emotionally.

I realize that my goals are very ambitious. That ambition can overwhelm me at times.

I also know there has been many times that I've talked myself out of writing a review and delving into a big piece or starting on the fiction series because my energy is low or that I just don't have the time.

The reality is that it has been a form of procrastination. Procrastination that has been fueled by fear, inadequacy, self-doubt, and anxiety, I feel that I don't have the skills to craft a review worthy of the movie that I've seen or that my creative story will be met with farts and burps of disdain.

This video about the realities of procrastination has resonated with me. If you struggle with being overwhelmed and not reaching your dreams, then I encourage you to watch it.

My desire is to catch a holiday miracle for my career this season, and to really throw my heart and soul into my work. Be willing to take some big risks. The only way 2023 can be my best writing year ever for my career and this site, is to end 2022 with some magic.